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Prospecting

I am certainly late to the formal announcement of my word for 2021. But, it's not that I haven't had one, or don't continue to think about it. I even used a form of it already in a text, and found myself grinning with affirmation.

  

Prospect (v; n)

Oddly, I had thought of the verb form first. Maybe it was subconsciously taking root after bingeing on movies over the holidays. (One day, I'll get back to a time of weekend movie marathons. 2020 was not enough of an excuse to catch up on cinema.)

There Will Be Blood opened with the scene of a single gentleman prospector, deep in his hand-hewn vertical shaft of rock and earth, picking his way to a few shavings of gold. The scene played long, beyond my comfort level, in that the way it was shot amplified the riskiness.

Do I plan to prospect for gold? No. At least, not in the traditional, metallic sense. The word is not just exploring, but probing. Not just surveying, but looking deep with the intent to see the makeup of something. Or someone. My word prospecting implies an ongoing seeking -- to see the gems, the preciousness, the value, the substance of what makes someone who they are.

I don't back down from the deep-dive into something like a word study ('prospect'!) or conceptual research (inclusive education, for instance). But I admit that I've never been really comfortable with getting to know people beyond a certain point. As an editor/writer, I've interviewed many people, but depth for a story is not the same as truly knowing someone. I know more people than I ever thought I would know, but going deep with people has been reserved for only a few.

Frankly, 2020 wasn't very encouraging in regard to making such quests. It didn't seem like most folks were themselves on any given day -- myself included. It was not always easy to see the best in people from the limited view and lack of presence available. I was comfortable giving people grace and second chances, but I'm wondering where things are headed.

This brings the noun form as something I've also decided needs to be included with my word.

I split that word apart (pro/spect), and it becomes "forward looking." It doesn't say to look back. It doesn't say, "Remember when...?" If anything, it says to look extensively, thoroughly toward the future, with vision that anticipates possibility.

Vision excites me. It points to newness and creativity and energy. I can even get around anticipating possibilities, because it's not saying to have expectations. Expectations are crushing when we're talking about vision at the same time. Expectations have set me up in the past like Lucy holding the football for her favorite blockhead kicker. I am continuing to learn the kinds of expectations that are helpful, boundary-setting and preserving.

What I want to experience is getting to know people again, and, perhaps, better. I want to put expectations out of the picture and consider the prospects instead.

I received an invitation to be part of an evening of conversation (in a safe, masked, socially distanced environment). All coming were people I knew, but some I hadn't seen in the flesh in months. With my acceptance came the first drop of my word: "I am intrigued and excited by the prospect of us joining together in this."

The time brought with it a restored level of comfort in seeing people, albeit, sharing with people, in person, had me feeling a bit vulnerable. Prospecting is not without risk. But, there was a great sense of renewal in understanding and an even greater longing to want to spend more time getting to know these friends again.

So, here's to where the road leads. I expect to be surprised by whatever I discover: beyond the surface, through the layers and toward the essential elements.


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